Proper Endings

One of the ways I used to catch myself out in the past was by doing too much. I packed the schedule so full (because that’s what you’re supposed to do at Christmas - right?) I had no space to breathe, no space to pause and take stock because I was on to the next thing. Then before I knew it the new year had kicked off and I realised it was the 15th of January!


It is super important for me now, especially in this liminal space, between worlds, as the old draws to a close and new eagerly awaits, to be purposive about how I move between the two. The seductive draw of leaping headlong into the new year and kicking away the current year without too much thought is strong. - New Year - New Me ringing around tempts us into the idea that collectively crossing the threshold permits amnesia of what went before. Let’s forget this year and move on. The thing is, leaving any business unfinished is a job we will have to attend to at some time.

I am a fan of reflection, and habitually employ it particularly at personal milestones, and yet I have to my detriment passed up the opportunity for meaningfully crossing the finish line at the end of year, instead I prioritised what lay ahead. This has been a disservice to me, the inevitable newness of what is coming has much more impact when it is approached AFTER cleaning up what went before. I would never dream of applying makeup to an uncleansed face…. So why did I do that energetically, mentally, emotionally - all the ways to the passing of my calendar year?

What I have come to know now is what a difference taking stock of an entire year in my life can do. How seeing it as a whole gives perspective not available when I’m stuck in the minutiae of the day to day. Zooming out helps foster a perspective which breeds wisdom and a deeper landing of the lessons, celebrations and triumphs that blur in the moment. I get to see myself differently, I get to experience myself more powerfully AND there is much more space for objectivity and impartiality. 

Pondering on how I have lived, who I have been, what worked, what did not work so well and choosing how to leave it behind, what to consciously bring forward with me is not only empowering and exciting, it is the very least I deserve. It is the very least the woman I am becoming desires in her quest for evolution, growth and the very best representation going forward. Because my life is about getting better at being me, about being more wholly and completely expressed, about me having more Whole Human experiences so that I show up better for me, and then everyone else. I have learned the need for me to take this time more seriously. Being able to contribute to the world on purpose changes the mark I leave behind, it alters the feedback that comes from my relationships and interactions. There is an undeniable ripple effect. I’m about that life, so I need to find ways to be consistent in how to make it true for me.

Not skipping on the intentionality that deliberate reflection brings at this time has shown up patterns that could be easily missed in smaller moments; it’s like a short cut to not having ground hog years one after another. I can see how I have been distracted by important parts of my life (for instance being a mother), it’s too easy for that to be the reason I neglect what the little girl in me needs. She needs me to be there, to notice where I have abandoned myself by taking the easy road because it seemed quicker only to discover that it meant doing more work later down the track. I want to be the woman little girl me, dreamed I could be, to make her proud, to uncover the potential that would otherwise lay dormant in the graveyard of abandoned dreams, laid to rest on the remnats of another’s cutting words. That requires my active desire, participation and action, and I have come to love being able to do that.

Here are some of the practices I use to get a bigger picture view:


  • Take time out - no phone, no distractions - time to be with me and listen to my body, my breath, my energy and emotions - especially when the festive period has a tendency to be an assault on the senses and take note of what I discover, noticing what my Whole Human needs from me

  • I journal on these prompts:


  1. What are the celebrations, accomplishments and experiences, events and relationships that I am grateful for in 2022?

  2. What did NOT work for me this year ?
    (Make a list of all the things that did not work for you and cross off what I don’t want to try again or improve on in the following year)

  3. What would I like to improve in the coming year from the above list?

  4. What didn’t I try in the current that I would like to try in the coming year?

  5. What do I want to bring into the coming from all the above?

  6. What do I want to/need to leave in the current year to help make my coming year desires possible?


  • Set out a plan of implementation including non negotiables to help keep my on track with the plan with commitment to check in points along the way

  • Complete energy clearing of the current year to make space for what I wish to welcome in the coming year. Including clearing out clutter in my physical space, rearranging the furniture, wardrobe, creating visualisations in line with this new energy

  • Self Reiki, mediation, integrative breathwork journeying to anchor in the energy


This is such an exciting time to bring in considered actions on absolute endings whilst taking bucket loads of priceless wisdom into the next steps. If our task in this life is to know ourselves, this can not be neglected in any way!